Refugees in Serbia: A Story of Human Connection

Refugees in Serbia: A Story of Human Connection

(Refugee Aid Serbia)

This is not a political article. This is an article on human connection. No human being should be considered illegal.

The UN High Commissioner for Refugees reported that 65.6 million people around the world had to leave their homes because of war, hunger, violence in 2017 alone. The UN says that every minute, 20 people leave everything behind to escape war, persecution or terror. This is a worldwide crisis that we must face together as humanity. I am sharing my experiences to facilitate further understanding and sympathy to others in similar situations.

It’s late afternoon in Obrenovac, Serbia, and the sun is going down at its usual time of 4:30 p.m. Though it is dark and gloomy outside, the Azadi Community Center is lit up and brought to life with refugees from all over and volunteers committed to helping out.

The Azadi Community Center, a project of Collective Aid, opened near Obrenovac Transit Centre in order to empower, create hope and improve welfare to the refugees. The center aims to provide a safe space with recreational activities, skills-based learning, language lessons and workshops. With a supportive atmosphere, the goal is to foster a feeling of community and purpose for the men staying at the refugee camp in Obrenovac.

I can speak directly to Azadi’s mission because I happened to be one of those volunteers. During my first week volunteering at Azadi, a group of men walked in with backpacks on, looking worn out.  Even after only a week there, I knew that meant they were unsuccessful at “The Game”, a term indicating the treacherous journey to cross the Balkan borders.

It was time for Language Café, the part of the day when beneficiaries participate in language practice with volunteers. The young man put down his bag and sat across the table from me.

“Hello. Are you a new teacher?” he asked me.

“Yes, I started last week!” I replied. I was surprised at how well he spoke English and felt a bit relieved to have a full conversation. Most of the men had very basic levels of English, which limited the conversation to basic phrases like “how are you” and “I am fine, thank you”.

I talked to him about where I’m from and how long I’d be in Serbia. The conversation continued.

“I have been in Serbia for five or six months. I have been trying to get to Germany, but the Game is really difficult, especially now that it’s winter,” he explained.

In situations when beneficiaries refer to their personal lives and struggles faced, volunteers are advised not to ask leading questions. Instead we act as a support system, practicing active listening. I followed these guidelines and remained present with him.

He told me he just returned to Serbia yesterday from Bosnia. A group of them nearly made it across the border. They had been foraging and sleeping in freezing conditions in the mountains. They were determined to make it to Germany. Some have family there. Others don’t know where else to go. All of them are holding on to the hope of a better life somewhere safe.

The Bosnian police stopped them just before the border to Croatia. The police locked the men in a dilapidated cell. I shuddered at the thought of a prison in a remote place in Eastern Europe. Then, at 3 a.m., the policemen took the men out one by one.

“The police were all very drunk. They broke our phones, stole our money, and beat us up very badly. They forced my friend to stand in cold water outside in the freezing weather. Others were beaten up and have broken bones. It was really bad.”

I sat and listened. I couldn’t say much except that I was sorry this happened to them. My words felt empty, but it was all I had to offer.

There was a long silence after I spoke. He lifted his head up and said,” I see it like this…our life is a book. Each experience is a chapter. Right now, I am going through a very bad, very hard chapter. It may seem like it isn’t going to end, but I know I will have a good chapter again. I just have to write it.”

“And remember how lucky you are, teacher,” he added. “You can return after this to your home, your family, your life. For some reason, we are not that lucky.”

Hope. Perspective. Resilience. During my time working as a volunteer at Azadi Community Center, this is what I saw in the men I met. These are people who’ve fled danger in their home countries just to be met with more challenges each step along the way to safety. They are victims of the Taliban or other terrorist groups who are reducing their country to a war zone. These are people who, despite being victims, are being seen as criminals or problems and are beaten by border police. They are just like you and me with families, friends, hopes, dreams…the only difference is the country in which they were born. Their resilience when everything seems to be going against them is a huge lesson for all of us.  

The refugee crisis is a global issue that requires all of us to work together compassionately to solve. We can all help in little ways. Donate to Collective Aid today.  The center is entirely volunteer run, so whatever you can donate would be of benefit to the cause.

Volunteering with Refugees in Serbia

Volunteering with Refugees in Serbia

“Cold outside today,” I said as I pointed outside to the gray, snowy winter day trying to make simple conversation with a young Afghan refugee. He shyly nodded and agreed.

As an English teacher at the Azadi Community Center, I try my best to prompt conversations in English with the men who come to the center. The Azadi Community Center, a project of Collective Aid, opened in Obrenovac, Serbia in order to empower, create hope and improve welfare of refugees and migrants in Serbia. The nonprofit aims to provide a safe space with recreational activities, skills-based learning, and language classes. Their goal is to foster a feeling of community and purpose for the men staying at the nearby refugee camp. The men are all ages, between 17-70, and from different countries, mostly Afghanistan and Pakistan. They’re in transit to reach the EU, escaping danger in their home countries and hoping to gain asylum in Europe.

The man pointed to his thin jacket, indicating how little prepared he was for the cold front. The temperatures the night before reached -7 degrees Celsius (19 F). Admittedly, I complained to my fellow volunteers the evening before about the unbearable coldness in our room since the volunteer house lacked heating. Now I wish I could’ve taken back my complaints as I listened to my student talk about his experience.

“No space in camp. I sleep outside last night. It was too cold. Police wake us up in the night and hit us,” he explained. Now I understand why he looked so exhausted, yet here he was in English class, taking notes with the rest of the guys in class.

After a month volunteering at the center, I noticed how little tolerance the Serbia police had for the refugees. There were daily stories of police cruelty toward the refugees. Police cars were regularly parked outside of the center, lurking across the street with their headlights turned off. The violence got even worse when the men were caught crossing the borders. The Croatian police beat some men so badly that they returned to Serbia with broken bones, their money stolen and morale at an all-time low.

All they want is a place to call home that isn’t dangerous. The Taliban invaded their home countries, and they witnessed the terrors of war all around them. What used to be memories of weddings and birthdays are replaced with fear and bombings. To them, leaving their home was the only option to ensure their safety, yet the police officers still beat them and the locals in Obrenevac give them dirty looks as they walk through the village.  

Life is suffering. We can see it all around us and most likely are numb to it at this point. We look away as a homeless person lies in the cold, unforgiving streets begging for money. We witness sadness, pain, and despair all around us in popular culture and even watch it for entertainment, yet this was the first time in my life I had felt a stranger’s pain fully with a tender, open heart. As he talked, I glanced into his deep brown eyes. I allowed myself to truly look and saw a man who had experienced more pain than I felt he deserved. This was someone who the world had been too cruel to. In that instance, I saw his basic humanity shine through and I let him see mine.

It takes bravery to allow yourself to open your heart to others’ pain. Only when we fully allow our hearts to break and hold others in compassion will our world begin to heal.

My travels have gifted me with experiences that have brought deep personal transformation, and for this I am grateful. Specifically, working with refugees has given me perspective and growth of paramount proportions.  It’s been one of the most humbling, difficult, and eye-opening experiences I’ve ever had.

If you feel inspired to make a direct contribution to the cause, donate to Collective Aid now. Visit their website to learn how your contribution can help maintain the Azadi Community Center.

How to Fail at Teaching Dance in 12 Easy Steps

How to Fail at Teaching Dance in 12 Easy Steps

Two hours have passed and I still hadn’t gotten anywhere. I let out a sigh and sunk into the couch, exhausted and a bit frustrated.

I’ve been volunteering as an Activity Leader for refugees in Serbia, and yesterday I was assigned to teach a dance class. Might I remind you that the class will be taught to grown men, Middle Eastern men.

I did a bit of research to learn more about dance styles from Afghanistan because frankly, I had no clue. A quick Google search all but eased my confidence, “Traditionally, it was a disgrace for a woman to dance in public. The concept of a woman as a professional dancer or entertainer was completely unacceptable in traditional Afghan society,” the website stated. Back in old times, I shrugged off. Yep, everything is totally fine. This helped, I told myself.

Seeing as the only dancing experience I’ve had in the past few years was late night (early morning) Ibiza night club scene with strobe lights illuminating a kaleidoscope of shimmering colors onto a sea of faded faces. Even earlier, I can recall a time in middle school when I tried out for the cheerleading squad. After weeks of practicing the dance routine, I got on stage in front of the judges and completely froze. Their pity-filled “bless your heart” smiles clearly implied that I did not make the cut.

Flash forward to now, a decade later, and there I was in the “pit”, the name affectionately given to the Volunteer House living room, the fluorescent lights glaring down at my defeat.

As a writer, I could laugh and the irony of it all, but it didn’t change the fact that I would be teaching dance class tomorrow regardless.

I had my laptop open to YouTube video entitled “Basic Bollywood dance moves”. A flamboyant, overly enthusiastic Indian man spoke in broken English, flashing a grin while guaranteeing the simplicity of the steps.

Lies! I thought as I closed my laptop.

I wanted to lead a class that my students would truly enjoy. Surprisingly dance class was one of the most popular classes of the week. All of my regular students questioned me daily leading up to the class.

“Teacher, dance today?” they asked.

“No, in three days,” I replied, feigning enthusiasm to match theirs.

Each week, the volunteers held cinema night in the refugee camp. The 800 men, mostly from Afghanistan and Pakistan, were entranced by the Bollywood movies we showed. Many of them requested these movies weeks in advance and already knew all the words to each song in the movie, a welcome distraction to the turmoil of their current situation.

It was surprising to me because Bollywood movies were so cheesy. The men cheered during the over-the-top romantic scenes and clapped and sang to the songs. I wanted my dance class to match this level of enthusiasm, and in my head,  I pictured all of us doing an epic dance routine to a track from the same movie they watched earlier that week.

Eventually my fellow volunteers and housemates walked into the living room, and I told them about my predicament. After a good laugh, we brainstormed ideas on how I could make the class work.

The next day I walked to the front of the room at 4pm sharp to begin dance class. Twenty guys stood in front of me smiling with expectant faces. There were about ten or fifteen other men sitting along the walls and crowding the doorway drinking mint tea, eagerly observing. I spent as much time as possible doing warm up stretches until finally, it was time.

I pressed play to the soundtrack that I never thought I would hear in this setting, and my fellow volunteers and I proceeded to do the Macarena in front of everyone. The silence beyond the music said it all. Once the song ended, no one said a word. Everyone’s faces were stunned as if they’d seen something they cannot unsee. Then, one student laughed out loud. I laughed with him, and slowly everyone was laughing.

“Teacher, what is this? This is not good. We do not like,” he said through his bellowing laughter.

“IT’S THE MACARENA, GUYS. IT’S A CLASSIC!” I pleaded, trying my best to defend this altogether simple and unexciting dance number.

“Okay, teacher, show us,” a guy in the back said with sympathy.

I proceeded to teach them the Macarena, step by step, which was actually more difficult than one would think since the rhythm of the music in their culture is so different. It’s like someone explaining to you the flavor of a spice you’ve never tried.

After 20 minutes of organized chaos and dancing in front of the class far more than I felt comfortable with, we played the song once again and went all out, all five of us that were still participating. The rest of the men opted out, shrugging their shoulders in what I assumed was either disinterest or disappointment. After that last glorious attempt, I gave the guys the floor, and they performed traditional Afghan dances. I sat back and appreciated their skill, poise, and the ease at which they flowed with the music. After all that they’ve been through, something as simple as their traditional music and dancing together can be uplifting and even healing.

Bollywood dancing, the Macarena, and a dance class gone terribly wrong. What’s the lesson in all of this?! Well, friends, you can’t be good at everything, but you can flow through life (awkwardly at times) with curiosity and a sense of humor.

Thanks for reading! Interested in learning how you can help with the refugee crisis? Check out the organization I volunteered with here. Contact me if you’d like to learn more about my time volunteering with them.

Finding and Living your Truth

Finding and Living your Truth

“Find a job you love and you’ll never work a day in your life,” they say. Others work to make ends meet and spend their free time doing things they love. There are endless possibilities and many choices when it comes to crafting your profession, but the question remains: How will you design your life? 

I’ve been asking myself this question again and again the past few months. While it’s true that this is a lifelong question, it is particularly relevant for those of us in our mid 20s. 

If you’re new to this blog, I’ll take a moment to explain my story up to this point… I’m Jamie, a world traveler and big question asker. I am 25 years old at the time of this writing, and I’ve been blessed to have experienced some pretty amazing things for someone my age. I’ve run with the bulls in Spain, solo traveled to many countries around the world, worked in interesting places like Congress in D.C. and beachside hostels in Puerto Rico, lived in Europe for 3 years, and have generally always been curious and hungry to learn more about myself and this big world we live in. After a year of traveling abroad and working remotely, I decided it’s time to settle down and find a place to call home for a while. This led me to asking myself, “If I could do anything or live anywhere, what would I do and where would I go?” 

Initially I chose Denver, Colorado and started applying for jobs. After living out of a backpack for such a long time, it was so nice to have a place to call home. I had a few interviews here and there, all of which were lengthy processes. During the interviews, I noticed the interviewees looked down on my extensive traveling. It simply did not fit their notion of employability. Of course, this discouraged me and made me feel a bit unwanted and unworthy, an outsider even. I continued applying with a wider spectrum of companies. I wasn’t even sure I wanted to work for these companies, but I felt a strong sense of should. I should get a “good” job. I should settle down. I should sacrifice my time and energy and eventually it would pay off…right? 

Two months passed in Denver, and I felt more confused than when I arrived. What was this all for? What am I meant to do? Could I truly work at a company that didn’t align with my values? Can someone just please tell me what’s right for me?!

All our lives we are told what to do from grade school to the college path to the bigger picture societal pressures of working up the corporate ladder in order to afford nice things. Not to mention, we probably only want these nice things because a talented marketing team has carefully crafted messages to make us believe we need these things to be happy.

Rant aside; I was seriously confused about what to do next. One morning I got in my car and drove to my old home, the meditation retreat center in the Rocky Mountains. Sometimes when you’re stuck, the only thing to do is look inward. So there I was, meditating in a cozy little room in the Rocky Mountains as I watched the snow softly fall outside. I sat and did nothing. I sat and watched my mind search for a solution. Slowly, my mind settled and the shoulds melted away.

When you sit like this, deeper Truths surface. Like the sun emerging as the clouds part on a stormy day, clarity shines through.  

Ah, yes! That’s it! I realized. 

I felt the answer rise from within. I was meant to live in a contemplative environment like that of Shambhala Mountain Center and facilitate retreats to help others discover their true nature and authenticity. This kind of environment is also the ideal place for self-discovery, something I highly value.

As I drove back to Denver from the mountains, I was sure this was the path I would take. I looked up the top retreat centers in the United States and abroad and sent out a few applications at the places that seemed right for me. 

Within two weeks, I received an offer to work on the Guest Services team at the esteemed Esalen Institute in Big Sur, California. I packed my bags and moved my life once again, but this time with more direction than the last. 

The path isn’t a straightforward one. We are meant to get confused, lost, and even feel sad and uncomfortable at times. These are the times when we can truly gain an experiential understanding of self-compassion and trust in the journey. Like my teacher Choygam Trungpa Rinpoche said, “The path is the goal!” 

So, my friends, if you’re in a similar situation, take a breath and enjoy the journey. It’s what we’re here for!

Slow Travel: 10 Ideas for Your Next Trip

Slow Travel: 10 Ideas for Your Next Trip

Next time you go on vacation, do something truly remarkable. Trade in the all-inclusive resort passes for one of these unique travel experiences. Whether it’s a week or a month, here are 10 slow travel ideas for you on your upcoming trip!

Walk the Camino de Santiago

Find yourself along a medieval pilgrimage throughout the many landscapes of Spain. To walk the most popular route, el Camino Frances, you will need about a month, but you can start from wherever you want or bike it if you have a limited amount of time. Read more about the Camino here.

Take a language course

Learning a language can open doors for your professional and social life. Instead of going to a country and just seeing the sights, you can truly experience the culture of a place by taking a language course. There are language centers in every country that offer courses in week-long increments, so sign up and make it happen. La vita é bella! 

Have you always wanted to be bilingual? Invest in yourself and take a language course abroad. Search for independent language schools in your country of choice. Most schools offer classes on a weekly basis and include culture classes in tandem with the language lessons. Si, la vita é bella!

House sitting…anywhere!

When other families go on vacation for an extended period of time, many times they will offer their home to a house sitter so that they can be assured their home is taken care of while they’re away. There are a few websites to find people looking for house sitters. This can be a great way to live like a local and save cash while traveling!

Do a meditation retreat.

Slow down and look inward on your next vacation. You can find many 10-day Vipassana silent retreats in Asia that are completely donation based. If you’re looking for something more intensive, Kopan Monastry just outside of Kathmandu has a month-long study and practice retreat in November that is highly recommended.

Volunteer at an elephant sanctuary.

Maybe you’re passionate about helping animals. A quick Internet search and you can find numerous elephant sanctuaries looking for volunteers to help with their cause. There’s nothing more rewarding than volunteering with a cause that you’re passionate about. Life is short, save the elephants!

Get ya surf on.

If you’ve always wanted to take time off to learn how to surf, why not fulfill that dream? Visit Hawaii, Costa Rica, or even Australia where there’s a community of surfers to learn from. I have heard of travelers doing a work exchange at surf schools as well. All you have to do is work part time and get free accommodation and free surf classes. Not to mention, you’ll get to meet all kinds of interesting people doing the same thing. As soon as you make the decision to take that leap of faith and make it happen, you will be surprised how many opportunities come your way.

Meet travelers from all over the world by working at a hostel

Hostels often search for people to volunteer via work exchange in order to keep their facilities running. You can work around 20 hours a week organizing tours, running reception, or cleaning. In exchange you get free accommodation and sometimes food is included! Not to mention, you get to meet travelers from all over the world. Pretty sweet deal, right? I use to find these opportunities.

Get connected with the earth…WOOFing 

WWOOFing stands for WorldWide Opportunity on Organic Farms. The organization hopes to provide a way for people to learn about organic food, agriculture, and sustainable ways of living. Get your hands dirty, connect with the earth, and WWOOF your heart out. 

Offer your skills to an organization you believe in (Teaching, art, etc.)

Just recently I volunteered with Collective Aid, an NGO helping refugees in Serbia and Bosnia. I spent a month working as an Activity Leader at their refugee community center where I taught English and led cultural activities for refugees at a nearby camp. It was an incredible and eye-opening experience. If you are inspired to help with a certain issue, there is nothing more rewarding than giving back!

Do something different for your next vacation. Try slow traveling! It can be eye-opening and inspiring. Get in touch with me for encouragement or planning. I’d love to hear from you!